Truths
by trunks111
Summary: CinderheartHollyleaf. femslash. Hollyleaf is in love with Cinderheart. But she is a murderer, and half-Clan! Can Cinderheart love her or does she love Lionblaze? Can Hollyleaf let herself love Cinderheart, knowing what she's done?
1. Was

**A/N: So..., I love this series, and it is dedicated to a friend. This is a fantastic pairing and my first ever attempt at this style and subject.  
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters, only the plot I have devised.**

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Cinderheart and Hollyleaf were nearly inseperable. After Lionblaze and Heatherpaw had gotten discovered in the tunnels, and Lionblaze had finally stopped seeing her, Cinderheart suggested she and Hollyleaf play and train in them. Hollyleaf was skeptical at first, but the other she-cat persuaded her that they wouldn't be breaking the warrior code, if anything, they would be becoming better warriors for their clan.

They went and played almost every night, growing closer and closer.  
Often times Hollyleaf caught herself thinking about the gray tabby. Sometimes she worried that Cinderheart was distracting her, but then she told herself that it was okay, because it was Cinderheart!

One night, as they were playing, Hollyleaf stopped and turned to say something to her Clanmate, but then Cinderheart pounced on her and they were rolling in the dust and dirt. Laughing, she rolled them over so she was on top, pinning Cinderheart's shoulders with her forepaws. Cinderheart went limp and Hollyleaf hopped off just as Cinderheart kicked up powerfully with her hind legs, missing Hollyleaf by mere inches.

Panting, Cinderheart sprang to her paws.

"We should probably get back to camp," Hollyleaf mewed.

Cinderheart nodded and padded up to her friend, their pelts brushing, Hollyleaf purred softly, relishing the closeness of her Clanmate. Then Cinderheart continued on, waiting a few pawsteps ahead for Hollyleaf.  
Heaving a soft sigh, Hollyleaf padded after her.

- After death of Ashfur and Gathering where Hollyleaf declares her heritage -

She plunged into the tunnels, where she and Cinderheart had played and trained for so many moons. She scrambled out of the way as the entrance caved in behind her. There was no way Cinderheart would like her now. Especially not if she ever found out what happened with Ashfur.

She ran, her paws thudding on the cavern floor. Cinderheart wouldn't love her. She ran faster, into new tunnels.

Eventually, she stopped running and just laid on the cold ground, drawing her tail around herself. She closed her eyes, slowly slipping into sleep, her dreams troubled by her Clanmates rejections, the one that hurt the most, was Cinderheart's.

- Cinderheart -

Cinderheart laid in her nest, Hollyleaf's was cold, yet her scent still lingered. She closed her eyes. She missed Hollyleaf, so much. She dreamnt of her, back to when they were playing in the tunnels moons before, when Hollyleaf had been about to say something, but she had pounced on her, so her words were never spoken. She wondered what her friend was going to say.

Lionblaze had become close lately too. She wanted to talk to her friend about him, but the few times she had, Hollyleaf had been annoyed, and... jealous? But why would she have been jealous of her brother? It was probably his fighting skill, Cinderheart decided. It was natural to be jealous, he was one of the best fighters in the clan.

Her dreams spiraled back to her and Hollyleaf's nighttime training sessions. Hollyleaf's hind legs were incredibly strong, she could jump almost as far as Spiderleg! And he was one of the longest legged members of the Clan. She purred in happyness, remembering how much she enjoyed hunting and training with Hollyleaf.

When she woke, the realization that Hollyleaf was gone, hit her like a physical blow. She stared at the empty nest, a deep pit of loss opening up insider her. On her other side, Lionblaze blinked open his eyes, and saw her gazing at his sister's empty nest. Wordlessly, he trailed his tail along her flank before shaking moss from his pelt and padding out to see if Brambleclaw had anything for him yet.  
She sat a while longer, gazing at the empty nest, before finally standing and stretching, carefully grooming herself before she heard Brambleclaw summon her to go on a hunting patrol with Brakenfur, Squirrelflight, Sandstorm, and Foxleap.  
She padded out of the den, sadness dragging her paws and clouding her blue eyes.


	2. Feelings

Hollyleaf opened her eyes. She was in the tunnels. Sighing softly, she stretched her stiff muscles. She padded along, scenting and using her whiskers to judge distance.  
She kept walking, knowing she was lost and not really caring. All she could hear was deafening silence. No one else had been down here in StarClan knew how long. And with the entrance blocked off, it was unlikely anyone would ever come here. It was a fitting place, she mused. She had killed him. Squirrelflight wasn't her mother, Brambleclaw not her father. Instead it was Leafpool and Crowfeather. ThunderClan and WindClan blood ran through her veins.

She wanted to wail aloud her fury, her sadness, her grief at leaving Lionblaze and Jayfeather. But that wouldn't do any good. Her stomach growled. Instead, she needed to find food. She had been one of the best hunters in the Clan. She pricked her ears, opening her jaws wide to catch any scents. She neither heard nor scent any prey, but... Cat-scent!  
Hollyleaf whirled around, tail lashing, claws unsheathed. But no one was there.

She felt a pelt brush her own and she spun to face the cat.  
Faintly, she could see a ginger and white tom, staring at her calmly from green eyes.  
"Wh...who are you?" she croaked.

"Fallen Leaves," the tom replied with a swish of his tail, beckoning her to follow him.  
She remained rooted to the spot, staring after him.

"I will explain on the way, but you're not dead, if that's what you're thinking."  
Wordlessly, she raced up to him and padded along beside him, curious.

"My name is Fallen Leaves, as I told you earlier. My mother and father used to live by the lake, like you do. I... failed my training assessment, I died," sorrow overtook his voice as he spoke, not looking at her, only facing the direction in which they were going.

"I'm destined to wander these caves. You're not the first cat to come here... Jaypaw has been here a few times. I've seen you a couple times too. With another she-cat. Another golden tom came here for a while too, with a she-cat," lonelyness tinged his mew this time, and she realized he had been down here, alone for moons upon moons upon moons!

She pressed closer to his flank as they continued through the never-ending darkness.

- Cinderheart -

She thought neverendingly about Hollyleaf. It seemed as though she was always at the edge of her thoughts, she could nearl hear her mew. They were two of the best hunters in the Clan, apart from Sandstorm, that is. She missed her terribly. She kept messing up basic things, like hunting for mice, she crunched a leaf and it escaped her. Later, hunting a bird, she forgot to check the wind direction and missed it too, she was too tired to try and chase it.  
When she returned empty-pawed, Brambleclaw set her searching the elder's for ticks. She didn't complain, she simply went.

Each pawstep made her heart ache for Hollyleaf. She padded into the medicine den.  
"What?" Jayfeather snapped, prickly, as usual.

"Mousebile," she replied softly.

He pushed a ball of moss towards her and continued what he had been doing.  
As she turned to leave, his mew surprised her, "I miss Hollyleaf too... And I'm sure she misses you."

Her pelt hot with embarrassment, she continued over to the elder's den.  
Purdy started on a story, so she didn't have to speak, only dab the bile on and leave. She went to wash her paws and managed to catch a squirrel on her way back. She took it to the elder's den, laying it down by Mousefur, whose nose began twitching, one eye opening as Cinderheart turned and padded away.

She didn't bother getting anything for herself, instead she padded to the warrior's den to sleep.  
Lionblaze called to her, to join him and a few of the other warriors, but she ignored him. She just wanted to sleep, because at least then, she could see Hollyleaf.

She curled up in her nest, falling asleep quickly, exhaustion deepening her sleep. She dreamnt, of Hollyleaf. She told her she loved her. Not as a littermate, but as she once thought she loved Lionblaze. In some dreams, Hollyleaf accepted, and they were happy, in others, Hollyleaf fled, and still, in others, she told Cinderheart that she hated her, called her a fool, a mouse-brain.

When she awoke, she felt worse than before.  
She heaved herself to her paws, and padded to the fresh-kill pile, selecting the smallest vole there. She padded to the edge of the hollow to eat, Brambleclaw called to her that she would be joining Dustpelt's hunting patrol when she was finished. She flicked her ears to show she heard and finished the vole. She had to be useful to her Clan.

Hollyleaf was gone. She wasn't coming back... Right?


	3. Truths

Moons upon moons passed, Cinderheart's heart, heavier than ever, especially since Lionblaze had told her of his destiny, and she had learnt of Cinderpelt, the cat whose spirit that was also inside of her.  
She desperately wished for Hollyleaf, she would know what she should do. If she were a medicine cat, like Cinderpelt, she wouldn't be able to have a mate. Not that she was looking, her heart was firmly on Hollyleaf. She was torn with indecision. She just wished Hollyleaf were back.

News of Hollyleaf's return spread through the camp. She raced out of the warriors den to see if it was true.  
It was.  
Blue eyes rested upon green, which looked hastily away. Her heart skipped a beat.

At last, when the cats left Hollyleaf in peace, Cinderheart bounded up to her.

"Hi," she mewed, wishing to say so much more.

"Hello," she mewed back, uncertain.

"Would you like to come hunting with me?" Cinderheart asked her.

"Very much," Hollyleaf dipped her head, grateful.

"Brambleclaw, Hollyleaf and I are going hunting!" she called to the deputy before plunging into the thorn tunnel with Hollyleaf behind her.

Hollyleaf relaxed once they were out of the camp, though not completely.  
Cinderheart looked back at her friend. She was sleek, her pelt perfect, her green eyes were troubled though.

"Is something wrong?" Cinderheart asked.

Hollyleaf looked at the other she-cat with piercing green eyes. "Oh there's lots wrong... I wish it could be right, but it never will be."

Her voice was so choked with bitterness that Cinderheart was at a loss, she sounded nothing like her best friend.

"Let's just hunt," Hollyleaf mewed, and took off, her paws making hardly a sound.

Cinderheart shook her head, she would try again after they caught something.  
She raced off, catching up to Hollyleaf near the middle of the territory, having caught a squirrel and a mouse, Hollyleaf had caught a blackbird, two mice, and a vole.  
Setting her catch down, Cinderheart mewed, "Hollyleaf..., they're something I need to tell you."

The other she-cat's piercing green eyes locked with hers.

"I... I... I love you," Cinderheart mewed, her eyes downcast.

Hollyleaf said nothing, merely studying her former best friend and denmate.  
"I love you as well, but... I fear you will not accept me, if you know the truthof why I ran," Hollyleaf mewed softly.

"Only if you will accept the truth about me," Cinderheart countered, striding over to Hollyleaf and pressing against her flank.

"I murdered Ashfur... In cold blood."

Cinderheart said nothing, merely pressing her muzzle to her friends in comfort.  
"I have the spirit of a dead cat in me, I don't know what to choose," Cinderheart breathed after a few moments of silence had stretched.

"Where your heart lies," Hollyleaf mewed.

"It lies with you," Cinderheart replied, gazing up into soft green orbs.

Hollyleaf purred, touching her nose to Cinderheart's.

"I will not leave again, ThunderClan is my home," Hollyleaf vowed.

"I will be the best warrior I can be," Cinderheart, too, vowed.

Tails entwined, they picked up their catch and began the return trek to camp.  
Their hearts lighter than they had been in moons. For they had finally told the truth, and it had, indeed, set them free.


End file.
